Timber

Straight up and a little to the right

There was a point in my life when I didn't believe that there were enough hours in the day to get everything which needed to get done...  Done.

As of yesterday, thanks to members of the United States' Congress, I have clarified my thoughts on the matter somewhat.  I now believe that while there still isn't enough time to get the really important things done, there's always enough time in which to create mischief.

From the Huffington Post, 03/14/2012:

As a member of a heavily male- and GOP-dominated state Senate since 2008, Ohio legislator Nina Turner says she has cringed watching her colleagues pass bill after bill to regulate women's reproductive health. Now, the Democrat has become the latest in a series of female state legislators to give her male colleagues a taste of their own medicine by introducing a bill that limits men's ability to get a Viagra prescription without meeting certain government conditions. 

"We should show the same attention and love to men's reproductive health as we do to women's," Turner told HuffPost. "And my bill does that."

Specifically, Turner's bill would require men to receive psychological counseling to verify that they have a medical reason for taking erectile dysfunction medications, such as Viagra, before they can legally obtain a prescription for it. It would also require doctors to inform men, in writing, about the potential risks of drugs like Viagra. 

The bill borrows language directly from Ohio's controversial "heartbeat bill," which bans abortions after the fetal heartbeat can be detected -- often before a woman even knows she's pregnant. But Turner said her bill is not just an answer to the heartbeat bill; she has been outraged by number of bills and amendments over the past couple of years, including one recently proposed to ban physician assistants from placing or removing intrauterine devices (known as IUDs), a common form of birth control, based on the Republican sponsor's moral opposition to that method of contraception. 

[Whaaaa?  Did anyone hear about ANY Republican 'moral opposition to that method of contraception???  Is Turner getting confused between the whole 'Church and State' thing again?  Why do all Democrats have Attention Deficit Disorder when they get to Congress?  Focus people, focus!]

"We need to fight fire with fire," Turner said. 

[Does anyone else get the feeling that Ms. Turner is 'At War' with Republican Men in Congress?  How is this possible during the Post-Partisan, Post-Racial, Post-Sexual Reign of President Obama?]

Turner is inspired by female legislators across the country who have been countering anti-abortion and anti-contraception legislation with men's health-focused measures that come with conditions, she said. Oklahoma Sen. Constance Johnson, also a Democrat, proposed a "spilled semen" amendment to her state's "feel personhood" bill that would declare it an act against unborn children for men to waste sperm.

Illinois state Rep. Kelly Cassidy, another Democrat, introduced an amendment to a state mandatory ultrasound bill that would require men to watch a graphic video about Viagra's side effects before being able to receive a prescription for it. A bill filed by Virginia state Sen. Janet Howell (D), would require men to obtain a rectal exam before obtaining such a prescription.

[Ah, yes, the dreaded 'rectal exam' provision.  The ultimate "UP YOURS" from the women of the Democrat Party to men across America.  Well played and memorable.  Men across America will remember this in November.  Although some Democrat Men may actually enjoy this aspect of the Bill 'a bit much'.]

"You know, the Cow Guy has a point..."

In Wilmington, Del., City Councilwoman Loretta Walsh authored a resolution that declares "each 'egg person' and each 'sperm person' ... equal in the eyes of the government."
...

Terri O'Neill, president of the National Organization for Women, said that while she would not endorse any of the gender equity amendments being introduced, she thinks they're a "brilliant" strategy to combat anti-abortion legislation.

"Obviously in terms of policy, we would not support any of these amendments; health care is health care and should be left to the individual man and his doctor or woman and hers," she told HuffPost. "That said, I think they've injected in a wonderfully humorous way some common sense. The whole idea of using humor that snaps people out of this one mind-set and gets them to look at the problem from a commonsense point of view; it reminds me of the humor used to defang Joseph McCarthy way back in the 1950s."

If her bill sends a message to male legislators and injects some common sense into lawmaking, then Turner will be pleased with that outcome--but, for the record, she's not joking at all, she said.

"I'm just as serious as a heart attack," Turner said. "I'm serious about the potential side effects of Viagra. I'm as serious as my right-wing male colleagues who introduced bills to legislate women's health. It's ironic that when it come to women's health people think that's a serious matter, but when it comes to a man, they think we're joking. I don't think any of my sister legislators are joking."
...

A resolution passed by the city council of Wilmington, Delaware calls on Congress and other states to pass laws giving eggs and sperm "personhood" rights.
"Each 'egg person' and each 'sperm person' should be deemed equal in the eyes of the government and be subject to the same laws and regulations as any other dependent minor and be protected against abuse, neglect or abandonment by the parent or guardian," says the resolution. "Laws should be enacted by all legislative bodies in the United States to promote equal representation, and should potentially include laws in defense of 'personhood,' forbidding every man from destroying his semen."
Councilwoman Loretta Walsh authored the resolution in protest of legislation like the Mississippi "personhood" amendment.
    

Seriously, how do you argue with logic such as that found above?  Oh, wait, that's right, you don't HAVE to argue with it - you only have to REMOVE it from the Congress of the United States. 

While our Economy continues to flail lifelessly about, oil prices continue to increase due to NO positive energy leadership out of DC, and our troops continue their duties in harms way while abiding by politically-motivated 'guidelines of engagement', Democrat women of the US Congress use THEIR time to write legislation to mandate rectal exams, declaring semen sacred, and personhood rights for eggs? 

Witless wonders all.  The common theme above is that each of the legislators referenced above is a Democrat.  The common theme evolving is that each of the legislators above will have a lot more time to work on their writing following the November 2012 erections (oops, sorry, that should read, 'elections').

You wonder why Congress can't get anything positive done?  It's because morons like these are honing their comedy routine vs. solving the real issues affecting each of us today.  The good news is that they'll be 'one of us' again soon enough.  Although, after reading the above, I can't help but think that even when they're out of Congress, they won't actually be like the rest of us.

Well, at least I hope they're not.  

That wouldn't speak well of us. 

We are NOT like them. 

Thank God.