"How Brown Was My Latrine?" (a.k.a.: Summer Camp 2011)

Okay, it's been a couple of weeks.  I can go there now.  I wasn't exactly sure how to get started, but starting is easy once fingers begin moving on the keyboard, the mouth begins mouthing the words I type, and the dehumidifier in the my downstairs 'Rec' room begins to drone on relentlessly. 


Grab my hand, we're going into the woods...


Summer Camp 2011 
July 3rd through July 8th


We took part in the annual pilgrimage to 'Summer Camp' a few weeks ago.  The weather was 'close' to perfect, highs during the day of mid-80's and in the evening it dropped into the high 50's.  Sleeping on the rickety cot and mattress in the WWII-era Boy Scout tent was better than sleeping in my own bed at home.  


I had a tent all to myself (due to an potentially-explosive 'methane' issue).  No, actually I was the 'acting' adult leader for this year's trip and we had an even-number of boys.  They got to bunk with each other - as for me, it was just me, all alone in my own tent.  It was nothing short of wonderful.  On paper, I'm the Assistant Scout Master - in real life, I'm Mike Kane, with my youngest son, Tim, in Boy Scout Troop 244. 


Our 'actual' Scout Master is the Ranger at Camp Tuscarora (you can call it Tuskie if you like - it's a lot easier to type or say, in a sentence).  'Ranger Mike' (not me, the OTHER Mike) pretty much runs full throttle from 5:30am in the morning till 11:00pm in the evening seven days a week for six weeks each summer.  Once summer camp is over he checks himself into a Camp Ranger De-Stress clinic for the 'serially sleep-deprived'.  I would imagine that 46 weeks out of the year, Tuskie is a great place to wake up in.


These six weeks of Summer Camp, though, let's just say, 'They'd kill a lesser man...'


I brought my digital camera with me to camp again this year.  The following photos took place over six days - you'll probably get through them in less than half this amount of time.  As for myself, I don't need the photos 'cause I was there.  My memory isn't as good as it used to be, but probably better than it will be in another ten years, but good memories have a way of 'sticking'.  Unfortunately, well, the bad ones, they get 'stuck' too. 


This post isn't about the 'baddies'.  It's about the 'goodies'. 


Let's get gettin' while the gettin's good...

Home Sweet Home for the Week July 3rd - July 8th, 2011
(Please take time to note the MAJOR Award underneath the
Chippawa sign - more on this in a second)

The Boy Scout Troop has been setting up at 'Summer Unit 3' (Chippawa Site) since before we moved into the area, and probably way before my kids were born.  It's quite possibly the nicest camp site in the facility.  It's got trees, it's got sun, it's got shade, it's got spiders, crickets, garter snakes AND a latrine. 

Seriously, what else could you ask for?  (Anyone who asks, "A TV?" is not capturing the 'Scouting Spirit' and will be struck in the face with a cream pie.  (They call this 'foreshadowing'...)) 

Ah, behold, the mighty 'Tuscarora Site Inspection' award!  Troop 244 DECIMATED the competition (two other Troops) by winning this MAJOR AWARD four of the five days it was given.  On the fifth day, it was awarded jointly to the other two troops we competed against because, apparently, no one has ever won it five days in a row.


How do you GET this prestigious award?  You need a clean campsite, a non-stinky latrine (more later), assigned chores for scouts, a well-maintained fire pit, no bears in your tents, a Dad (me) to trim the lawn via industrial Weed-Eater (louder than a jet engine) and lastly, a 'site improvement' project.  (Think 'brown' - don't rush me, I'll get there...)
    

"Doo, Doo, Doo, Lookin' Out My Tent Flap"

On Monday afternoon I rested after a fun-filled morning of mowing, trimming, and edging the campsite.  In the picture above, but not really visible you'll find a lawn mower and the Weed Eater from the US Weed Eating Olympic Team. 

Can't see 'em?  They're there, trust me.  Okay, how about now?

Oh yeah, I got site-clearing skills...  Of course, after snapping the above photo I fell asleep for  almost two hours.  In my head, however, the 'metallic-mosquito-from-Hades' noise of that dang Weed Eater continues to this day.

Home away from home, July 2011...

Behold the Fire Pit!

The fire pit is pretty much Ground Zero at the campsite.  There are EXTRAORDINARILY uncomfortable benches (with 'BONUS splinters!') surrounding half of of it, the other half is where people who planned ahead of time had folding chairs set up (I was one of 'them').  I lay my weary body down on the bench for a moment in order to get a photo of things much greater than myself.


This, is that photo...

I really like this picture.  I don't know if it's because it was a beautiful day, or if it just 'put things in perspective' for me.  In any event, this is what I saw as I lay down upon the 2" x 6" plank next to the fire pit.

When we arrived at camp on Sunday, we signed up for the 'now-near-legendary' Bear Cave Hike.  In the photo above, we see Scouts walking away from me as I take another photo.  Thinking back, I spent the entire week watching the back of kids' heads.  I was the 'scooper' for most walks / hikes.  If anyone lagged behind, I would 'Scoop' them up and move them forward, hopefully, not trampling any others in the process. 


At the end of the walk, I could have used a 'Scooper' of my own - I was 'Pooped'. 


I was a 'Pooped Scooper'.  (This, it turns out is better than being a: 'Pooper Scooper'...) 

There ought to be a sign:  "The Bear Cave - Stay AWAY!!!"

There wasn't a sign warning us off. 

Luckily for us, the bear was OUT for the day.


Remember, I'm the 'Scooper'.  I've got the slowest-walking kids back here with me.  As the old adage goes, "I don't have to outrun the bear - I only have to outrun YOU." 


Although, I really didn't want to find out the hard way WHO the slowest of the group was, because, most likely, it was me...

The side of the 'Bear Cave' rock formation AND bonus twisty-trunked tree!

Camp Tusky has a 'Back-Up' emergency alert system.  If there is a camp emergency the horn on the top of the dining hall blasts loudly until you can no longer hear ANYTHING ELSE.  If, however, the dining hall loses power, bursts into flames, is inhabited by bears or they can't reach the button to trigger the alarm, there's always the 'Bell'. 


I've been at camp now for six summers.  I never looked at the bell until this year.  I should have looked sooner.  It was manufactured by Meneely's Bell Foundry of Troy, NY.  It features the patented 'Meneely Rotating Yoke' (not making this up). 

The bell was manufactured in 1857.  Yeah, that's over 150 years old.  Almost as old as my Chrysler.

Okay, that's pretty cool.

Each day we line up outside the Dining Hall for Breakfast and Lunch.  The above photo is of the flag-raising ceremony.  At dinner we meet at the parade grounds, in uniform, for the flag-lowering ceremony.




At lunch, you challenge Staff to friendly 'Competitions'.  For example, you can challenge a staff member to a 'Fishing Challenge'.  If he / she catches more fish than you do, as the 'Challenger', YOU get a pie in the face.


When challenged by the Scout, the ONLY acceptable response in reply is, "To the Death!"


Example:  "I would like to challenge Tom to a Smores Eating Contest!"


Response:  "To the Death!"


Then, everyone claps, shouts, and in general question under their breath, "Can you really DIE eatting Smores?"  I don't believe so - as I'm still alive. 


If you DO accept the fishing challenge referenced above and if you catch more fish than the Staff Member does, the following series of events takes place:


1.  Everyone is called to the center of the Dining Hall

2.  The results of the Challenge are carefully reviewed and tabulated using highly efficient scientific methods.  For really high fish count numbers (over '10'), shoes are removed...


3.  If you lose the challenge, you get a whipped cream pie to the face, as illustrated below

Moments after this photo was taken, several bears stormed the Dining Hall and ate this staff member's head. 


It's a shame really, he was a nice kid. 

As the day begins to wind down, there's nothing better than a bunch of scouts sitting at a rickety picnic table teaching each other the 'Life Skills' they'll need to be successful as they get older:


a.)  Telling Jokes


b.)  Telling Tall Tales


c.)  Comparing Merit Badge Achievements


and, of course, the proudest Scouting experience of all...


d.)  Learning How to Play Cards Without cheating

So as the camp fire dies,and the sun sets on another year at Camp Tuscarora, we ask ourselves: 


WHAT did we learn this year? 


Which memories will last a life-time?


The answers to the above questions are pretty much the same as every other year: 

• We learn that there are things greater than ourselves.
• We learn that being away from TV, Radio, and the Internet helps you sleep better at night.
• We learn that if you hear 'snuffling' noises and leaves rustling coming from the outside of your tent at 2:14AM early Tuesday morning - it might NOT be a hungry bear. 
• We learn that eating 'Beefy Bean Burritos' at noon and sitting too close to the camp fire that evening is NEVER a good idea. 
• We learn that those people who honor the past of our Nation will help shape it 'for the better' in the future.
• We learned that on the Fourth of July, by recognizing our Nation, those who serve in the US Military, and playing 'God Bless the USA' over the dining hall speakers WILL make Mr. Kane remember how much he misses his son serving the US Navy in Japan.  A couple of years ago - he was at this table.   
• We learn that sometimes Mr. Kane cries in public - even when he's trying hard not to.

and,

• We learn that if you volunteer for a 'Site Improvement' project which includes the 'Staining' of the latrine - it's better to get the stain delivered on Monday morning vs. Thursday night.

Why?  Because Troop 244 is the first group to stay at the campsite since last summer.  Stuff from beneath the latrine has pretty much dried out / dissipated over the winter.  Butt (big butt), if you don't get the stain until dinner-time on Thursday and don't start staining until Friday morning...  Let's just say it doesn't smell as good in the latrine on Friday as it did on Monday morning.


The question which began this post:  "How Brown Was My Latrine?"

Over the past few years porcupines, squirrels, chipmunks  and other 'denizons
of the woods' conspired to chew the wood within the latrine.  Someone had to
sand, and paint it, right?  Yeah, that would be me...

The Answer:  "Very"




I'll leave you with the following.  The kids packed their tents, rolled their bags, and had headed down to the parking lot to get signed out by their parents.  I made one last trip to the campsite to make sure that no gear, kids, or trash was left behind (it's a Boy Scout thing). 


As I approached the campsite for the last time a deer stepped onto the road about ten feet in front of me.


We stared at each other for probably no more than thirty seconds, but it felt as if a much longer period of time passed.  There was no fear in either of us - just a mutual understanding of each other. 


We both 'belonged' there.

With a quick look back at me and a leisurely turn to the right, my new-found friend left the campsite. 
Having completed his inspection, I began mine.


Yeah, it was 'all good'. 

How I'll Spend My Summer Vacation...

Hi,

I just wanted everyone to know (not that anyone cares... much) that I'll be spending some time away this week.  As a result, there won't be any blog posts (no, really, it will be 'okay'!  Quit your sobbing!) for the remainder of this week. 

If I were better organized, I could have proactively set some up to post in my absence, but, like I said, "If I were better organized"...

For anyone wondering where I have gone, please refer to the following 'Last Year's Post' by way of explanation. 

It's that time again.  It's Fourth of July week, the heat is hot, the sun is high, the mosquitoes are breeding, and I'm goin' to camp. 

Have a great week folks - remember to find a moment this Fourth of July week to reflect just how lucky you are to BE where you are.  Right here in the good old USA. 

Be safe, be happy, and try NOT to be attacked, and eaten, by bears...

Mike


Would you, could you, in a Tent???

Last week I had the privilege of spending a week in the woods with my youngest son, and several other Boy Scouts from our local Scout Troop at Tuscarora Scout Reservation. Okay, so the week wasn't a trip to Disney, but, yeah, so? I was able to spend an entire week speaking with, and hanging out with my son and a couple of kids who I've known for quite a while. It was 'All good'...

Not ONCE were we accosted by someone wearing a 'Character Suit' (although, this does not take into consideration the night I wrapped a heavy, brown blanket around my body, loped through camp after dark, making 'bear' noises as I shook and scratched on tent flaps. Okay, so it wasn't my 'shining moment', but it was a LOT of fun when I was a kid. I guess the only difference between then and now is that THEN I looked more like a cub than a full-grown black bear and NOW it'll be weeks before my Scout-inflicted wounds heal completely.)

NOTE TO SELF: Next time you plan a simulated 'Bear Attack' because you think it's funny, make sure the kids taking the Archery Merit Badge don't take their Bows and Arrows back to camp at night. The arrows, even when 'mostly' stopped by a thick blanket hurt a LOT.

In all, no lives were lost, but it'll be weeks before I sit down again without 'grunting'. Why couldn't the kids take 'Painting' or 'Basketry' Merit Badges like I did?

Ah, yes, here we are, Troop 244 Vestal, NY. Notice how our signage is much 'Yellower' than the troop above us? This was a mistake, but in hindsight, even on the darkest night of the week, it's sickly-electric-yellow glow still attracted moths from 47 miles around.




While at camp, please remember to visit ANY of our well-labeled sites, such as the Lake Shore, Nature Center (complete with a chicken name... Colonel Sanders), Chapel, or our Council Ring.




Ah, home sweet home, Summer Unit Three, the Chippawa Site!




I took a walk in the woods... And I was amazed.




While it hadn't rained for several weeks with temperatures in the 90's every day we were at camp, the forest surrounding the campsite was lush, thick, and, what's the word... Beautiful.




Sunset at Camp...




A photo of a 'Princess Pine'. These guys are EVERYWHERE around camp. They are typically less than 10 Inches tall and up close are extremely cool to look at. I don't know why this is, but all I know is that they fascinate me whenever I'm at camp. Each is a piece of art.




Like I said above, it hasn't rained in a while. The rocky 'road' below is normally a stream around six inches deep.

 


This is Council Point. On Monday evening the leaders and boys participated in a Flag Retirement Ceremony where we retired twelve flags. Yes, we burned them. No, it wasn't in protest. It was with respect.




This is 'Lake Shore'. From here, kids and adults can swim, canoe, kayak, AND board sail from this fully-equipped and fully-staffed pavillion. No one goes in the water without their Buddy Tag (and their 'Buddy').

Everyone who goes in is monitored and watched while in (or on) the water. And yes, everyone who went in, came out safely again... Another successful Scouting venture!




Another photo of the lake, this time from the trail which encompasses it.

 


Ah, the Dining Hall. At Summer Camp, all trails lead to the Dining Hall.

 


Morning Grace in the Dining Hall


It reads: "Gracious Giver of all good, Thee we thank for rest and food, Grant that all we do and say in Thy service be this day"

And in case you're wondering? Yes ALL kids in camp SING the above and following Grace(s) prior to each meal. The Scouts are not shy, they do no mumble it under their breath, they sing it loudly three times a day, every day while at camp.

Will wonders never cease? Teenage boys praying out loud and in public? What kind of CRAZY organization is this??? 

Oh yeah, Boy Scouts. Those Radicals...


Noontime Grace


"Father for this noonday meal, we would speak the praise we feel. Health and strength we have from Thee, help us Lord to faithful be"


Evening Grace


"Tireless Guardian of our way, Thou hast kept us well this day. While we thank Thee we request, care continued, pardon, rest."

Amen.


The lake at Dusk.




Random shots from around the camp. This one is a shot of the Quartermaster's building. Need shovels, saws, axes, or Toilet Paper? This is where you go! Just don't 'Go' to the toilet here, you'll need to save that for your beautiful, environmentally-conscious latrine! (Sorry, no photos here, you'll need to use your imagination (think of Congress - yeah, now you've got it!))





Yes, even I can make a fire (when it hasn't rained in several weeks). Every Wednesday night we cook at the campsite to give the cooks at the Dining Hall the night off. Then we invite staff members to share our meals with them. (I'm not bragging (much) but the Wednesday night meal was the best meal of the week - well, at least I think it was. Of course I COOKED it...)

Home sweet home for the week. If you listen very hard, you can almost hear the mosquitoes from here...



The Scout Staff prepares for the end of day ceremony.



Boys and Dads line up at the end of another hot, sticky, but oddly gratifying, day...
 


From Tenderfoot to Eagle Scout, boys wait patiently to lower our Nation's Flag at the end of each day. 
 

Yes, this flag



Boys line up outside the Dining Hall waiting for dinner.




Black bears sleep. Also, waiting for dinner. The Scouts are late tonight...


The week was hot, sticky, and long.

I wouldn't have missed it for the world.

If you'd like to learn more about scouting, search for your local Scout Council at: www.scouting.org

Your child (and other children) will thank you.

All I ask is that in the future if YOU are on a camp-out with your children and a large, shaggy, laughing, and 'mostly-upright' bear is lumbering through your campsite, please take a moment to see if the bear is wearing New Balance Sneakers prior to 'shooting' it.

Please???

Thanks!